Humanity
by FirstLove15
Summary: Sequel to  More Than One  and  Torn  now there is Humanity. Damon and Elena have fallen inlove, but it will be afight to be together.Now Damon will finally find HIS humanity, literally. Shocking, Romantic, and intense. Read More Than One,Torn, & Humanity
1. Chapter 1

**To new readers, this is the third story added to a series i've been doing. If your interested in this story please read More Than One and then Torn before you read this. This is definatly a Damon/Elena story. More Than One takes place after the episode Isobel after she makes it clear to Elena that Damon is inlove with her. Lot's of crazy twist and turns and oh so sweet stuff. Check it out and enjoy. To my continuing readers, thank you so much for reading and I'm so glad you have been loving it. Please! Remember to leave reviews, it absolutely pushes me along quickly and helps me more then you think! Thanks guys :)**

Damon sank back down to his knees, I kneeled down beside him.

"Damon?" I whispered. He looked up at me, his eyes full of shock.

"He's going to be a little out of sorts for a few days, you might want to get him home." I heard Tabitha say behind me. I turned to face her. She was standing with hand on her hip, her head cocked to the side with the most amused look on her face.

"Why are you doing this?" I hissed.

"Because I hate him." She snapped back.

In a flash I was up grabbing her by the throat, lifting her up with one hand.

"I'm going to need a detailed explanation bitch." I let her drop to her feet where she stumbled for a moment.

"Fine...I _really _hate him. He tried to kill me just a few days ago!" She yelled. "Plus think about it Elena. What better person to do this to than a vampire that completely abandoned his humanity!"

I looked back to Damon who was now sitting up against the wall holding his head between his palms.

I turned back to Tabitha.

"I can hear his heart beating. His breathing. Did you really turn him back? Is he human again?" I asked.

"Yeah." She replied, her brows raising.

"Why do you seem surprised?" I asked.

"Because I am surprised. I didn't think It would actually work." She smiled and shook her head in disbelief.

"So what's your exact motive for doing this? Besides him trying to kill you. I mean...why didn't you just kill him somehow?" I asked hating the sound of it on my tongue.

"Elena. Death is not something Damon would consider the worst thing. Damon has been angry and hurt for several lifetimes but he's been able to turn it off at will. That's why its always so easy for him. And as far as I know, the only wall he let down was to let love in from you. But now, everything that's made him angry, everything that's made him hurt and all the evil deeds he has done...well, he's going to have to deal with it now. I just want to remind him what being a human feels like."

"Clever." I Whispered.

"Keep your mouth shut about your little love affair with him. If he figures it out, so be it. But I'm tired of everything being served on a silver platter to him Elena. So leave it alone. Or I'll have him killed. It would be so easy...now." She turned and walked away. I Watched her disappear behind the corner of the alley way. I turned and rushed to Damon who was still sitting against the building holding his head.

"Damon, are you okay?" I asked feeling panicked.

"My head...it's pounding." He managed to choke out.

"Come on, let me get you back to the house." I said putting my arm around his waist and pulling him up with almost no effort. I was struck by his scent so strongly I almost dropped him. It was so sweet and strong I could barely manage to keep myself composed. We made our way to the car and I got in. I kept to the speed limit, considering Damon's newly required safety. Once we were inside the house I helped him up the stairs and to his room. He fall onto the bed and wrapped his arms around himself.

"Elena, why do I feel this way?" He asked, his voice sounded hoarse and weak. I sat down on the edge of the bed and ran my hand down the side of his face. It was so warm, his pulse quickened and it seemed like thunder to my ears in the quiet house.

"Because your alive." I answered.

**Revieeeewwwsss :D**


	2. Chapter 2

I sat there on the edge of the bed listening to the silence of the house, the tranquil beat of Damon's heart.

"I thought Tabitha was dead." Damon finally said.

I looked at him, laying on his back with his arm draped across his face.

"Why did you kill her?" I asked.

He moved his arm and looked at me. "I don't know." He answered. "I don't remember." I watched him narrow his eyes at the ceiling seeming to be bothered by something.

"What I want to know is how she managed to pull this off. I've seen a lot of witchy tricks in my day but this is quite the grand finale." He said.

"I don't know." I replied.

"It's...it's really …..strange." He said. I waited for him to continue but when he didn't I looked back down as I watched his eyes flutter and close. His breathing became steady and I realized he had fallen asleep.

2Am rolled around when Stefan made his way through the door. He found me sitting on the couch in complete silence. He looked around for a moment confused.

"How was the party?" I asked.

He made his way over to the couch and sat down.

"Good I guess. I noticed you and Damon left so I left and went to hunt. I figured I'd leave you guys alone." He said never making eye contact.

"It wasn't because we wanted alone time. Something happened." I sighed.

He looked up in alarm. "What happened?"

"Well, don't say anything...just listen carefully and tell me what you hear." I said.

I watched Stefan look off in concentration. Listening to wind rustle the leaves outside, the crickets...and then he heard it. The faint thrumming of Damon's heart.

"Who's here?" He asked looking at me surprised.

"Damon." I answered.

His brows pulled together in deep confusion. "I'm not following you."

"Well, when Damon went to find Katherine to get her to make him forget...the same witch, Tabitha who made me forget was there and apparently Damon killed her...or so he thought. She came back tonight looking for revenge." I explained.

Stefan nodded. "Sounds like Damon's usual day. Still not getting it." He said nodding towards upstairs.

"She used some kind of spell. Damon...isn't a vampire anymore. He's human. She somehow turned him back." I replied.

Stefan laughed for a moment and then looked back up at me. His laughter quieted and his face went very serious.

"Elena!...your not kidding." He said startled.

"No, trust me...I'm not kidding." I answered.

He stood up suddenly and started pacing the floor.

"That's his heart?" He asked taking a small break in his path across the floor to ask.

"Yes." I answered. Watching him from the couch.

"Revenge." He said with a small laugh continuing his pace.

"What's funny?" I asked.

"Probably because turning him human is less like revenge and more like a gift. Neither one of us wanted this Elena...especially not Damon. He would have rather died." He explained.

"You really think it will be a gift to Damon when his natural emotions come crashing in on him over everything he's been through in the last century and a half?"

"More like everything he's done." Stefan huffed a sharp bitter laugh.

"It's not funny Stefan. This was meant for pain, not a gift." I snapped.

He finally ended his pacing and sat back down. "I'm sorry...this is just way to crazy to comprehend. How is he?" He asked.

"I guess we'll see in the morning. He was just kind of out of it tonight. I'm sure the effect it has on him will be clear tomorrow." I explained.

Stefan nodded and we sat in silence for a few minutes. "Does he remember the two of you yet?" Stefan asked.

"Not yet, He said something about a dream he had...said I was saving him from the sun. So I guess it's starting to come back to him." I explained.

"So why aren't you up there with him?" He asked.

"I just told you, he doesn't remember us being together." I sighed.

"There's something else. Something more than that." He pushed me to confess. I didn't say anything. I just sat there studying the particles of dust mingling in the air.

"It's his scent." He answered himself. "You can't be too close to him." He said.

I looked at him in silence confirming his accusations.

"Sucks doesn't it? I remember when I had to go through that with you." He said. He looked up sweeping his eyes across my face..looking deeply. I looked away uncomfortable. I was trying to figure out what I was going to do with this catastrophe, the last thing I needed was Stefan trying to be sentimental.

"You need to check in at home sometime Elena. Jenna is going to send out a search group for you." He said.

"She's out of town visiting a friend a couple of hours north which is kind of perfect right now...I'm not leaving him Stefan." I said.

He nodded.

The sun was beginning to rise as I made it back to the boarding house. I didn't know what to do quite yet so I went to the market to pick up some food for Damon. It was still all so surreal and I didn't know if I would be able to except this as reality until I saw him again. I walked inside and began putting the food up in the kitchen that had only ever been used when my own heart was still beating.

"This is just weird." Stefan said standing against the kitchen counter watching me put everything away.

"Tell me about it." I said in agreement. I heard a slight rustling upstairs and realized Damon was awake. Stefan and I shot a look at each other as we heard him slowly make his way downstairs. I almost gasped at the sight of him as he made his way towards us. I had never seen Damon look so disheveled. His hair was a mess, his white t shirt and sweats hung strangely on his body that was looking smaller in frame and frail not to mention the five o clock shadow. But it was his eyes that got me the most. They looked tired and worn but somehow he looked about four to five years younger. I wasn't quite sure why, But he still managed to look absolutely beautiful, that was one thing that could never change about him.

"Damon, how are you?" I was at a loss for words and that was the best I could come up with, between the silent stare of Stefan and my shock.

"Alive and kicking." Damon said quietly and shrugged.

"I can't believe this." Stefan said looking at Damon in complete awe. He walked slowly towards Damon looking him up and down. "But it's true." Stefan said. "Your completely human."

Damon nodded but said nothing.

"Damon, you need to eat something. I got all kinds of stuff here and I can make you anything you-"

"No...I'm not hungry." He said turning and walking out into the living room. I followed.

"Damon, you already look like you lost 15 pounds you need to eat something. You can't just ignore this." I said.

"Elena, please. Just...not right now okay?" He said turning away and making his way to the counter. He took out a glass and poured some scotch and took a sip. He slammed the glass down and cringed with the burn of alcohol.

Stefan tapped me on the shoulder and handed me a glass of water.

"Damon, this isn't how humans go about dealing with hunger. Here please, if your not going to eat, at least drink some water." I said holding the glass out to him. He sighed and took the glass out of my hands, taking a few sips he made a face and sat it down. He walked to the kitchen and opened the fridge looking at all the new found stock I had just put in there. He reached in and grabbed a coke.

"Mmm, sugar drink." He said popping the tab. He gulped it for a second. "Okay, so I have a plan, who's in?" He said.

"What do you mean, a plan?" Stefan asked, finally lifting his jaw from the floor.

"I'm going to find Tabitha. I can't be like this. I just...can't." Damon said. He stood and looked at Me and Stefan. The strangest look of bewilderment took over his face. It was a look I'd never seen before on his face.

"It's not a good idea Damon. She made you like this...what makes you think she'll change you back?" Stefan said.

"I don't know...but what else can I do?" He shrugged. "And nothing isn't an option I'm willing to bargain with." Damon said.

I stood for a moment considering his words but I was also to busy noticing the way his words were so soft when he spoke. The way his face looked years younger even through his tired appearance. I never realized what a difference there was between a human and a vampire other than the obvious. It was small things too. That's when I noticed that he looked younger because his face had grown so soft without the stone scowl he had always had chiseled into his features. I was hit with longing suddenly. I wanted to hold him close, breath in his scent. I wanted to feel his lips against mine. Yet there he stood, asking for help and completely unaware that I was desperately in love him.

"I'll go." I said.

Damon and I made our way out to the car. I felt like I was walking in slow motion allowing Damon's slow human to not be so obvious.

"I'll drive, I'm pretty sure I know where she is." He said jingling the keys in his pocket.

We pulled out and headed east through Mystic Falls.

"Where exactly are we going?" I asked after about ten minutes.

"It's a very old property about an hour in this direction. It was a house Katherine's father built. Since Tabitha seems to be Katherine's go to girl I figured it was the best bet." He explained.

I nodded.

"So I take it your not enjoying this whole non vampire thing." I said.

Damon smiled looking out onto the road. I noticed him paying a lot more attention then I'm used to seeing. Forgetting he was stripped of all his senses and now had to rely simply by sight while driving.

"Well, let's just say I need to get out of my own head. Being human...it makes you think. I don't like thinking." He said looking out of the drivers side window and away from me.

"Or feeling?" I asked. He didn't answer. He just kept gazing out of his side of the window. The tension began to grow thick. Just as I was about to make up something to say to break the ice Damon turned up the radio as loud as he could blasting an old Counting Crows song.

"Mr. Jones...nice. Loved the 90's." He said drumming his fingers on the steering wheel. He sang along almost as loud he could rolling down the windows and letting the wind whip around our hair. It was when he began to hold his own hand up like a mic and sing the words to me that I laughed. Regardless that he was completely clueless that not only am I in love with him or that we had spent a significant time together in complete bliss, regardless of the danger and unanswered question...I was so happy in that moment. It felt innocent and light hearted. Like even I was human again, back at school and having the time of my life. I love Damon Salvatore in any way that he is.

After it was over and changed to an old Osborne song, Damon laughed softly. We drove without speaking for a few more minutes when he turned the radio all the way down.

"You remember that time we went to Georgia?" Damon asked. My stomach flipped with the memory. Bad time but an awesome night.

"Of course I do." I answered smiling. "Why?"

"Eh, I don't know. I guess this little car trip brings back memories. Your still not the worst company in the world." He said smiling looking out onto the road. I smiled in complete joy that he still remembered that day.

"Well thank you, neither are you." I answered.

His face grew serious for a moment.

"Sometimes I get these...flashes ..." He went silent, eyebrows creased together seemingly in deep thought.

I looked at him, eyes wide, realizing he was trying to tell me he was seeing us together. "What, flashes of what?" I asked.

He shook his head. "Just crazy stuff." He shrugged. "My imagination has a tendency to run away sometimes." He smiled...a smile that never reached his eyes.

"Tell me Damon." I asked.

Suddenly he turned the car and we were in a drive way with a mansion sitting at the top of the hill. I stared at the house. "Is this it?" I asked, taking in the huge house in front of me.

"This would be it." He answered.

We got out of the car and made our way to the door. He used the huge gargoyle door knocker. I watched him release the door knocker and took in the detail of the evil bronze face.

"They had weird taste." He said pointing at the gargoyle.

I smiled just as the door swung open.

"Damon Salvatore, I figured you would show up." Tabitha said smiling.

"Tabitha, what can I say?...Good move." He answered.

"Well, come on in." She said politely as if there were no conflict whatsoever. We walked inside as I took in the infinite detail of the house. Dark wood floors that seemed to stretch on forever, a dome ceiling in the foyer. The lavish materials and colors seemed to roll like distant hills. I felt like I was suddenly in Pride and Prejudice.

"So, how are you two doing?" She asked grinning at me.

I shot her a wide eyed look to notify silently that Damon was non the wiser about our affair. She nodded.

"Well, I'll be honest. My heart beating in my ears, the dull vision and the spotty hearing is slightly annoying. Plus it takes me a while to make it up and down the stairs without requiring heavy breathing." Damon rattled off.

"Well, you are nearing 150 years old...so I'd say your doing pretty good." Tabitha smiled.

"Okay, let's cut to the chase. You made me human, and I don't want to be. What can I do to make this change?" Damon said over politely.

Tabitha smiled and walked closer to Damon. "Feel something. For a change. Then we might talk." She smiled.

Damon's face fell serious and he seemed to study Tabitha's face closely.

"Look, I'm sorry I hurt you." Damon said.

"No, you killed me." She corrected.

Damon shifted uncomfortably. "I don't even know why it happened, I was hoping that maybe you could inform me on that. I'm sorry Tabitha...I really am." Damon said softly.

"Well see, your off to a great start. And no...figure it out for yourself." She said.

"No! Change me back!" Damon suddenly yelled stepping towards her in a rage.

She held her hands up and an invisible force suddenly lifted Damon off of his feet and slammed him into a nearby wall where he fell to the ground. I lurched forward but stopped as she gave me a warning look. She walked up to Damon who began to stand up.

"Don't mess with me Damon." She warned. "Your too weak for that now. I have my agenda set out for you and you will follow it. Do you understand?" She hissed.

He got up and brushed off his shoulders blatantly ignoring the pain he was trying not to flinch from.

"Loud and clear." He replied calmly.

"Good." She smiled. "The door is that way." She pointed behind us.

Making it back to the house in almost complete silence I instantly insisted that he eat something. I walked up to him with an apple in hand.

"Come on Damon, just eat something." I pleaded as he began to head upstairs.

"No, I'm not hungry." He protested.

"Damon please!" I said. Holding the apple almost in his face.

"Elena!" He snapped back knocking it from my hand. "I don't want it. What's your deal anyway? Why do you care so much all of the sudden?" He asked. Suddenly his eyes locked with mine and for what seemed like forever he looked deeply into my eyes, in the kind and loving way he used to. It was so strong that for a moment I thought he had remembered everything.

"I just want to help you." I whispered.

His eyes shifted to the floor. "Well, don't. I can take care of myself. I always have." He replied. He walked by me and out of the front door, slamming it behind him.

**Please, leave reviews! It's what pushes me forward to write. Hope ur liking it :D**


	3. Chapter 3

I waited for what felt like hours for him to return. I didn't want to push him over the edge but I couldn't help but to be worried. He was used to being indestructible, and now he could get hurt so easily. My patience finally ran out when the sun began to fade behind the trees. I couldn't be completely sure where he had gone but I had a pretty good idea. I got in the car and drove to the usual bar and grill. I made my way inside. It was packed, people everywhere playing pool, dancing around. The base of the music thumped heavily.

I scanned the crowd unable to spot Damon anywhere. Then I spotted a face that was familiar. Tabitha sitting at a near by table taking a sip out of a mug of beer.

"What are you doing here?" I asked as I approached her.

She smiled. "Elena, what a pleasant surprise." She said.

"You know, besides just being very aggravated in his own skin right now, your master plan to break into Damon's heavily guarded pcyche doesn't seem to be happening." I snapped. "No major meltdowns as of yet."

"Oh, just give it time Elena." She smiled, completely relaxed.

"By the way, he seems to be remembering things about us pretty quickly. I know I'm not supposed to say anything to him, but what if he figured it out on his own. Eventually he's going to ask questions. He's going to wonder if it's true that I love him." I explained, trying to unclench my fist from my unadulterated rage.

"Well, if that should happen then I guess your best answer would be NO." She smiled. "You'll say it's not true, you'll tell him you love Stefan as usual." She explained.

I looked around for a split second to make sure nobody was watching the corner where she sat. I leaned in mere inches from her face and grabbed her throat hard enough to cut off her breathing.

"Give me one good reason why I shouldn't just kill you right now." I said through clenched teeth. I could feel my face tightening into a darker look, ready to kill. I loosened up just a bit when she tried to talk.

"I can't die, remember? Damon tried first." She choked out. I let go. She rubbed her neck.

"Well well, Elena. I think Damon has been a bad influence on you. He's becoming more human and your going to the dark side, taking his place. You guys are a cute couple." She laughed.

"And what exactly do you plan to do to him if I tell him the truth about us?" I asked.

"Elena, I'm watching. In more ways then you know. I will be sticking to my plans. The second you get in the way of that he will drop dead at your feet. I promise." She said, her face still and serious.

"What are you doing here?" I asked again.

"Just keeping an eye on things." She answered, pointing over my shoulder. I looked behind me and saw Damon holding a glass of scotch and talking to a couple of girls towards the bar. I started to walk towards him but then turned back to look at Tabitha.

"You know, you think your so great because your teaching Damon a lesson about what it is to be human. How are you so great?" I asked. She said nothing, only answered with a smile.

I stormed away and made it up to Damon.

"Elena! I have to tell you something." Damon slurred horribly. He leaned in towards my ear. "I'm completely trashed." He said. I looked at him just in time to see him crack into laughter. For some reason I couldn't help but to smile. I don't think I had ever seen Damon truly drunk, until now.

"Well, seeing as there is such a thing as alcohol poisoning and your used to drinking five times that, we should probably get you home." I answered trying to be stern but it was hard, he was smiling at me. His beauty was devastating.

He leaned into me burying his face into the side of my neck. I felt his hands slide around my waist. I was on sensory overload. I had Tabitha eyeing me across the room, I had butterfly's wrecking around my stomach at Damon's touch. But the worst of it was the fire turning down my throat at his scent. He leaned back up and smiled.

"Your hair smells like flowers." He flashed his eyes at me the way that buckles my knees. I through some money on the bar.

"It's time to go Damon." I said pulling him towards the door. I looked up right before we walked out to see Tabitha waving with a grin on her face.

Out in the parking lot I made sure Damon got into the car and I got behind the wheel. I drove him home as fast as I could. I helped inside and up the stairs into his room.

"You need to take a shower, it will help sober you up. I'll go make a cup of coffee and you will be eating something." I said sharply. I walked into the bathroom and turned on the shower testing the temperature with my hand. I turned and saw him fumbling with the buttons on his shirt, trying to unbutton them with one eye closed, most likely to stop the double vision.

"Here, let me help you." I said. It took me seconds to unbutton the rest. When I looked up his lips crashed into mine, he kissed me so deeply I felt like I could barely stand. He leaned back and looked at me.

"I shouldn't be doing this." He slurred. But he back me against the wall and pressed his mouth into mine again. I ran my hand down his chest as I felt his hand sliding under my shirt. His hands were hot against my skin. I felt like I was in heaven. Then the burning in my throat returned. Suddenly all I could hear was the rapid beating of his heart. He had my body pressed against the wall with his and I moved my lips to his neck. I felt my face begin to tighten and I knew my eyes were growing dark. I could feel my canines growing sharp. I pushed him as gently as I could but it sent him stumbling backwards. He managed to catch himself on the bathroom counter.

"I'm sorry." He said. "I know that was wrong, I'm really sorry." His face was saddened.

I knew that for many reasons I couldn't allow this to happen.

"Just take a shower Damon." I said coldly and left the room.

A while later Damon made his way downstairs much more sober. His wet hair hung in his face as he made his way over to the kitchen. He opened the cabinet and took out a bagel. He started out slowly but was quickly moving more into scarfing it down. I knew he had to be close to starving.

"There's cream cheese in the fridge." I said after a minute, afraid to make him stop eating.

"Yeah, I was planning on using it but...I was pretty hungry." He said quietly. He reached into the cabinet again and pulled out the super sized back of potato chips. He began shoving those down too. Simultaneously gulping a soda.

"You should be careful. Your going to gain a freshman fifteen." Stefan joked as he made his way into the room.

I shot him a warning look daring him to make Damon begin the starving process again. Damon ignored him and shoved another pile of chips in his mouth.

"So how was your day, in your condition?" Stefan asked.

"Fine." Damon answered putting the chips back in the cabinet and running his hands down his shirt to wipe them off.

"Well how about tomorrow you don't run around like a crazed college kid on a mission. You were turned this way for a reason, so quit being an asshole. Making Elena go drag you from a bar...good move Damon." Stefan snapped walking towards him. He got close to Damon's face.

"Cool your jets." Damon said quietly. He put his hand out and gently pushed back on Stefan's chest as he walked by him. Stefan snatched Damon around by his shoulder.

"Now who's on a weak diet?" Stefan hissed and punched Damon in the chest sending him flying backwards onto the floor.

I flashed to Damon and helped him up.

"What is wrong with you!" I yelled. "You wait until he's no match for you and then you push him around? That's really mature Stefan."

"Don't worry about it Elena, can you really blame him?" Damon shrugged.

Stefan flashed up to Damon and grabbed the bottom of his face. "Just stop acting reckless Damon, for once in your life!" Stefan yelled.

"Let go of him Stefan." I hissed.

"Oh give me a break Elena! A year ago you hated him. He was a "Monster" to you. Don't be so hypocritical. You have spent more time angry at him then anything. Don't forget...love is blind!" Stefan yelled.

I looked over to Damon. He had definatly noticed what Stefan had said about love. He was looking down to the floor, his brows creased with thought. He looked at Stefan.

"I'll act better." Damon simply said. He turned and looked at me for two long seconds. I questioning look, wrapped in tenderness. Then he headed upstairs.

**Please leave reviews! I need to know what its lacking, and what you love! :D hope your enjoying!**


	4. Chapter 4

I waited for Damon to make his way upstairs and shut his door. I flashed over to Stefan just in time for him to turn towards me.

"First of all -" I began, and punched him in the chest sending him flying backwards. He jumped back quickly to his feet. "Don't ever touch him again. Second of all, don't mention the past to him ever. Your going to get him killed." I hissed.

Stefan gave me a long uneasy look. "Are you okay Elena? Your acting really strange." He said with concern.

"No Stefan I'm not okay. I'm in love with a guy who not only has a death threat on his shoulders, has no memory of our relationship, and I've almost killed him on accident twice but I also don't see how any of it is getting better. Only worse." I explained in a rush.

"You almost killed him?" He asked in shock.

"Its...his scent." I sighed.

"Look I'm sorry about treating Damon rough. I just don't want him to get himself killed running around acting crazy. And just because you love him doesn't mean you have to let him get away with everything. It doesn't mean he's always right." He said.

I gave him a long steady look. "Just keep your hands off of him." I warned again.

Later that night when I was sure Damon had fallen asleep I made my way quietly upstairs and into his room. I kneeled down beside the bed and laid my head on my arm and watched him sleep. I wanted to crawl into his arms. I wanted my life back. I wanted Damon back.

The cell phone in my pocket vibrating woke me up and I realized I had nodded off. The sun was beginning to come up and I glanced over at the clock. It was a little after 7am. I got up quietly and made my way into the hall. I looked at my phone and realized it was Bonnie calling.

"Hey, Bonnie?" I answered.

"Elena, I made it in last night. Sorry to call so early I just missed you and I figured maybe we could have some girl time before I un hex Damon." She laughed.

"Bonnie?" I said again, my voice cracking with fresh tears. Somehow hearing the comfort of her voice suddenly made all the pain I had been feeling begin to rise.

"Elena! What's wrong?" She sounded alarmed.

"Everything." I began to sob.

"Get over here Elena and tell me what's going on." She demanded.

She was waiting for me on the porch when I arrived. I instantly hugged her as soon as I made it to her. She hugged me tightly. We made it inside and sat down on the couch. I took a moment to get snuggled in and pulled the blanket that always hung on the back of the couch off and held it too me. This was the closest I had come to comfort in so long. She sat down across from me.

"Okay, now tell me what going on." She said.

"It's just been horrible since you left Bonnie." I began to tear up again.

"Well I'm about to make him remember everything Elena, don't worry, everything is going to be fine." She smiled softly in assurance.

"No...no not anymore." I cried.

"What do you mean?"

"It's Damon...he's been turned human." I sobbed.

Her head went from a relaxed concerned tilt to straight up, alert and shocked.

"What do you mean, he's human?" She asked, her voice becoming stern and severe.

"His heart is beating, he's breathing. He...has a scent." I trailed off in tears. "He's 100% without a doubt, human." I explained.

She sat for the longest time, her face frozen in shock, watching me cry and processing what I had just told her.

"Tell me the whole story." She finally said.

I went on to tell her every detail, about what he did when he went to see Katherine, Tabitha coming back to seek revenge, turning him human and everything she had said since including the threat to kill him if he knew of our relationship.

"I just...I just can't believe it." She said shaking her head.

"Have you ever heard of a spell like that?" I asked.

"Never." She simply answered.

"Do you think there is anything you can do?" I asked.

She paused for a long while seemingly in deep thought.

"Elena, take me to him. I have to see this for myself." She said.

I looked at her surprised. "Bonnie, this isn't a freak show." I said.

"No, Elena...it's not. But do you remember how much our lives changed when we learned about the existence of Vampires...of witches?" She said pointing to herself. "At least we had fairy tales to depend on, but this? This, Elena is absolutely...incredible. Vampires turned human?"

"Fine, I'll take you to him, but Bonnie? Will you help me?" I asked.

"Yes Elena. I will." She answered.

We arrived at the boarding house a few hours later. Because Bonnie wanted some girl time I insisted before we came and watched Damon like a caged lion, we watch a movie first. We made it inside the house and found Stefan sitting in the living room against the couch amongst piles and piles of old journals.

"What are you doing?" I asked.

"Organizing."He answered. "Hey Bonnie." He smiled.

She waved with a smile.

"What brings you around these parts?" He asked.

"I uh..."

"Came to see Damon?" He smiled.

"Pretty much." She nodded.

"Yeah, so... where is he?" I asked.

"He's indulging in recreational activity in the common room." He smiled.

"What exactly does that mean?" I asked.

"See for for yourself." He grinned looking back to his journals. But before we could take a step Damon came into the living room. I could feel Bonnie's energy go onto hyper speed. He walked in wearing jeans and a loose, white Rolling Stones t-shirt. His dark hair hung in his eyes but as he passed us going for the kitchen he managed to run his fingers through his hair, brushing it away from his face.

I turned and looked at Bonnie who mimed a shocked look at me. We turned and watched him rifle through the fridge and take out a Coke. He popped the tab and then noticed us standing there, probably looking no doubt like complete idiots gawking at him.

"Hello ladies." He said drinking from the can. That's when I noticed his hands were stained with colors. I then noticed he even had a few streaks of something on his face. One across his forehead and the other across the top of his cheek bone.

"Damon, what are you doing?" I asked. He lowered the coke can and smiled at us.

"Come see." He said.

We followed him into the common room which before now I had never seen used at all. There was a large white cloth laid out onto the floor with an easel and a canvas sitting on it. So far, painted on half the canvas was a thick forest, seemingly at night. It was beautiful, what little there was of it.

"You...paint?" Bonnie asked, as if reading my mind.

Damon picked up the brush on the easel and held it in his fingers studying the canvas.

"I did...a very long time ago. I woke up this morning and...I wanted to paint." Damon smiled walking back towards the canvas. He struck the brush lightly a couple of times across the surface and stepped back again.

Bonnie looked over at me with an expression I couldn't quite read. It was somewhere in between fascination and confirmation.

"Do you think the sudden interest has something to do with your recent events?" Bonnie asked.

I looked at Bonnie trying to give her a look that said...don't bother him with that. Damon continued to study the canvas closely, planning his next mark.

"I don't know Bonnie. I haven't had a pulse in almost 150 years...there's a lot of questions in the air." He said calmly moving in on the canvas again.

I moved back and sat down on a chase lounge not far behind. Bonnie moved up to where Damon was standing and painting.

"What are you painting?" She asked studying it closely.

"Just something from my...uh.. imagination." Damon answered softly. He turned and looked at me for a split second and then returned his focus.

Bonnie looked over at Damon, drinking in every detail of him closely. I saw her assess him and the small differences that made him so different.

A while passed. I still sat on the chase lounge watching Bonnie and Damon chat while he was painting. I realized that I had never actually witnesses them getting along before, not hardly.

"Damon, you should paint a picture of me sometime." Bonnie laughed, still standing next to him while he painted.

"Sure." He smiled.

"Oh, I have this picture of my Grams on her 32nd birthday. She's so pretty. You think you could paint a picture off of that?" She asked looking at him hopefully.

"Mhmm." He nodded. "Just let me know when, I'll do it." Damon said.

Suddenly she reached over and took the brush from his hand and dropped it to the floor.

Damon looked at her more in alarm then confusion. "Bonnie?"

"It's your fault Damon." Bonnie said suddenly looking enraged.

"What?" He said looking at her in confusion.

"My Grams, it's your fault that she died." She said. Damon stood without speaking, as if he was frozen.

"Bonnie." I said trying to stop her from saying anything further. She put her hand up towards me.

Damon looked at Bonnie.

"It took every ounce of strength she had in her body to try to get Katherine out of that tomb, for you." She said coldly. Damon looked at Bonnie as his face flinched in pain.

"Bonnie, I'm sorry." He said in almost a whisper.

"No! She died for nothing Damon. Katherine wasn't even in the tomb. All we wound up with was a whole bunch of trouble and and then that was over...and so was grams." Bonnie said, beginning to cry.

Damon watched Bonnie in what could only be described as unadulterated horror. I saw his eyes well up and he instantly wrapped her in his arms.

"Bonnie, I'm so sorry." He repeated again through tears, resting his cheek on the top of her head.

She wiped her eyes and looked up to Damon.

"It's okay... it's ok now." She said.

We all sat around and talked a little longer.

"What are you thinking about?" I asked while driving Bonnie home.

"Damon. How much he's changed. Did you notice how much he even looks smaller, like he's kind of skinny now?" She asked.

"Yeah, he looks kind of different, but...I still think he's so beautiful you know?" I asked.

"Oh, no definatly, he's pretty." She said as we both laughed.

We pulled into her driveway.

"So you think you'll be able to help me?" I asked. There was a long silence. When she didn't answer I looked over at her. She was looking at me to but in the saddest way.

"Bonnie?" I said startled at the expression on her face.

"Elena, I'm not going to help you." She said slowly.

"What! Why!"

Bonnie looked down at the floor board of the car and began to fidget with the bottom of her shirt.

"Because Elena, It's just not right. He's human now...he feels the way he should. He feels love, and sorrow and...remorse for what he's done.. He finally has...humanity." She said. "I just can't handle the idea of taking that back." She looked up at my horrified expression. "I'm sorry." She said. She opened the door and walked briskly back into her house.

**Reviews please o please. I need your opinion. Thank you **


	5. Chapter 5

I came back to the boarding house and found Stefan standing in the living room flipping through an old book.

"What are you doing now?" I asked.

He closed the book and put it back onto the shelf nearby.

"Waiting for you actually." He said. "What was Bonnie doing here?" He asked.

"I went to her for help, and she wanted to see him for herself." I explained.

"And judging by the look on your face I would say she decided against helping you?" He asked.

I nodded and sat down on the couch, choking back tears.

"Maybe she's right, maybe not. I think you miss more then Damon's memory. If it makes you feel any better...I don't think Damon's actually changed much...he's just softer and easily breakable and I think he might be a little scared for the first time in a century. It doesn't change the fact that he might be a little more sensitive to his emotions but...I don't know." Stefan shrugged.

"What are you saying exactly?" I asked confused by his rambling.

"I'm fully aware of what ...and who..you fell in love with." He said. "and I'm sorry your going through all this." He said and then made his way upstairs.

A few minutes later Damon came down the stairs. He didn't seem to notice me even sitting on the couch as he made his way to the kitchen. He opened all the cabinets, looking through everyone, pushing things around.

I got up and walked closer to the counter. "Looking for something in particular?" I asked. He didn't answer, or even look my way. Just kept looking through everything. He stopped for a minute seeming to contemplate something in the cabinet.

"Damon?" I said again.

Still he didn't even look at me. I was hit with sudden panic. Was he ignoring me, did I make him mad for bringing Bonnie over? I was about to apologize for whatever I had done when he grabbed out a box of cookies and turned towards me and jumped.

"Oh! Omigod...you scared the hell of me!" He said pulling earphones out of his ears. I hadn't noticed them before now that his hair had began to grow into a shag.

"Oh, sorry. I didn't realize you had those in." I smiled.

He laughed nervously and then leaned onto the counter digging through the cookies.

"So how are you feeling?" I asked leaning on the other side of the cabinet, our face not even a foot away from each other. I took out of the cookies and bit off a tiny piece. Food just didn't taste the same anymore.

"Well, I'm going to need a gym membership soon, and I'm pretty sure I might be getting a cold...but other then that...I'm glad I finally have an appetite for something they can't chase me out of town for devouring." He smiled.

I laughed. "You look just fine, I doubt you will ever need a gym. You would probably just put them all the shame." I smiled, trying to avoid looking over his body too closely.

"Elena Gilbert...are you flirting with me?" He unleashed a devastatingly gorgeous crooked smile. I stood for a moment unable to speak. I wanted to rip him over the counter and have him all to myself. But the nightmare I was dealing with suddenly hit and I knew I had to stop where this was heading.

I rolled my eyes and sighed. "Don't start Damon." I said turning to leave.

I heard him throw the cookies in the cabinet and slam the cabinet door. I walked out of the house so I didn't change my mind.

I realized it was the day that Jenna got back home so I decided to go back to my house and show my face around so Jenna didn't ask any more questions then she already was.

I made it to the house just as Jenna pulled into the driveway herself.

"Hey Jenna." I said approaching her as she stepped from the car.

"Hey, missed you!" She smiled hugging me around the neck.

"How was the trip?" I asked.

"Well, Aunt Julia is doing good." Jenna smiled...no, more like beamed.

"You seem ...really happy." I smiled.

"I met a guy." Jenna laughed. "His name is Rob. He's in med school, and enjoys long walks on the beach and all that." She smiled.

"That's great Jenna, but...isn't it like over an hour away?" I asked.

"Yeah..I know. But if it doesn't bother you too much I'm going to be going back to visit him, and he will probably come visit me." She explained.

"Wow, so I guess it's kind of serious then." I smiled. She smiled brightly.

I helped her with her luggage and made it inside.

Jeremy sat on the couch playing video games. He looked up when we came in.

"Hey Jenna." He said.

"Is this all you've been doing since I left?" Jenna smirked.

"Pretty much." Jeremy answered smiling. As soon as Jenna turned her back and made her way into the kitchen, Jeremy shot me a hard glance. I knew he was probably curious as to where I had been for the last several days. He looked back to the screen and continued playing as I went upstairs to my room. I laid down on the bed and closed my eyes. I ran through everything that had happened. I thought back to the day I sat next to Stefan and explained that I just wanted to talk to Damon to clear things up about what Isobel had said. How I assured him that I loved him and he had nothing to worry about. I couldn't believe that everything had changed so drastically. I heard a knock on the door.

"Come in!" I called. The door opened and Jeremy walked in shutting the door back behind him.

"What's going on Elena? Where have you been?" He asked.

"Look Jeremy, I'm sorry. Stefan has been going through some stuff so I've been keeping him company." I explained even though it was a lie.

"How long has he been going through stuff? It's been a long time now that you've been acting strange. Your hardly ever home or at school and when you are...your just not the same." He said.

I looked down to the floor unsure of what to say.

"The last I recall you were leaning a little more towards Damon. How's that going? Because I have a pretty firm belief that he has something to do with this change. It's like your completely..." He stopped mid sentence and a look of horror washed over his face.

"That's it isn't it?" He said taking a few slow steps towards me.

"What's, what?" I asked. Afraid of why Jeremy suddenly looked so startled.

"You _are _with Damon. He changed you didn't he?" He demanded.

"Of course not Jeremy." I said horrified that he had figured it out.

"Don't lie to me Elena, you know what happened last time you kept things from me. This is the first real conversation we've had. Are you really going to start it off with lying again!" He said frantically, his voice raising.

"Jeremy calm down." I said.

"No! Answer me!" He yelled.

"Yes! Okay? Yes...he changed me." I said not believing the sound of my own voice.

Jeremy stood shocked, looking me up and down. Trying to process the information.

"Jeremy I'm sorry. It's what I wanted." I said.

"No it's not...it's what _he _wanted." He said. He turned and stormed out of the room slamming my door.

BOARDING HOUSE

Damon stood out on the balcony outside of his bedroom. He looked down studying his paint stained hands. He checked the watch on his wrist wondering if Elena was coming back to the house, or if he had made her mad enough to stay away. He noticed the moon was exceptionally bright as it lit up the night casting shadows past the tree line in the yard. Suddenly he heard a noise behind him as if there was a sharp gust of wind. He turned and looked behind him but saw nothing. He turned back around looking back out into the yard.

"Well, look at you Damon Salvatore." He heard her say behind him. He whipped around to see her standing there, her head tilted in curiosity.

"Katherine?" He whispered. She flashed up to him, inches between them. She leaned towards his neck and breathed in deeply.

"Ugh, I can't remember the last time you smelled this good." She moaned.

"What are you doing here? And where's your little witch side kick who did this to me?" He asked.

"Oh, trust me, she's not to far out of reach." She smiled.

"What...are you doing here?" He asked again.

She smiled and walked closer to him. He backed up a few steps.

"I was just coming to see how you are. I'm really surprised at you Damon with that move you pulled, locking me up. When is everyone going to realize that I have backup plans?"

"First of all, I don't remember doing that. Second, speaking of plans I'm starting to think it wasn't really Tabitha's plan to make me this way. It was yours, why?" He demanded.

"Aww Damon, don't get so ahead of yourself, let the story unfold. What happened to your sense of adventure?" She asked. She reached up and ran her fingers down the back of his neck, playing lightly with the back of his hair. He reached up and moved her hand, surprised that she actually quit.

"What do you want from me Katherine?" He asked sternly.

"I can think of one thing I definetly want from you." She purred, leaning in she kissed his neck. "How about we go into your room for old times sake huh?" She whispered in his ear.

"Stop it Katherine, just tell me what your really here for." He said. She sighed in annoyance and backed up looking at him.

"Well I know your having some memory problems but you agreed to move away with me and I'm here to collect." She explained.

"Well, it's obvious that I then, locked you in a closet and killed your friend." He answered.

"Well, lucky for you I don't hold grudges. Well...I do...just not with you. Come on Damon. Let's just move away, start a life together. There's nothing for you here." She whined.

"Katherine, you were gone for well over a hundred years. I looked for you, I wanted you...but you chose to make me believe you were dead. So now...your dead to me." He snapped.

"Damon I'm sorry! I had some things I had to work out okay? But I'm here now. I want you back. I don't why your holding onto this place. Stefan is preoccupied with his little girlfriend, he doesn't need you. Your only hurting yourself. So forgive me and just come away with me." She pleaded.

Damon sighed and looked at the ground. He didn't even know what to say at this point.

"Listen, you don't have to make a decision right now okay? Just think about it. You know it's the best plan, just let go of whatever your holding onto here. It's not available to you. I'll be back. Just think it through okay?" She smiled and kissed Damon on the forehead. Then suddenly she was gone.

ELENA

As soon as Jenna went to bed I got back in my car and made it over to the boarding house. I made my way inside and noticed the light on in the common room. I walked to the doorway to find Damon finishing up what seemed to be the last touches of his painting. I couldn't believe what an exceptional painter he was. He turned around and saw me.

"Your back?" He smiled. "What do you think?" He asked moving out of the way so that I could see the painting clearly. My stomach sank when I realized it was me, sitting in the woods at night, surrounded by a cloud of fireflies.

"It's...beautiful Damon. Your very talented." I nodded. "Is that me?" I asked. He laughed softly shaking his head.

"What?" I asked.

He turned and walked towards me. "Are you telling me you don't know what that is?" He pointed to the canvas with the frozen picture of one of my fondest memories lavishly painted.

"A painting?" I played dumb.

"Elena, when are you going to stop with the charades already?" He looked shocked.

"Damon I don't know what your talking about." I said again.

"Stop lying to me! I remember things..about us. There's a lot blank areas but I remember us falling inlove, you saving me from the sun, I remember us...being together." He said as he walked closer. He ran his fingers gently down my face.

"I don't know why your remembering these things but there not real, they must be your imagination..."

"No, my imagination isn't _that_ good. We were together." He said looking deeply into my eyes. His face was frantic. Like he was searching for the truth just by looking at me. He leaned in a kissed me softly but it grew quickly into burst of violent kissing as he pressed me against the wall.

"Stop it!" I finally said when I gathered my senses. I pushed him back. "You don't know what your talking about!" I cried.

"Elena please just stop. You don't have to hide anything from me. If there's something wrong you can tell me what it is and we'll fix it...together." He pleaded.

I felt tears running down my face. "I'm not hiding anything." I began to sob.

"Look at me Elena. Look at me right now and tell me you don't love me." He snapped. He reached under my chin and raised my eyes to meet his. I could barely make out his face through the tears.

"I don't love you." I sobbed. His face broke into the most devastated look. He let go of my chin and backed away.

"I guess Katherine was right. There isn't anything for me here." He said quietly.

"What? Katherine was here?" I asked.

Damon's hurt eyes met mine. "Just go." He said.

"Damon, please!" I cried.

"Just go!" He ordered.

I turned and ran out, leaving him behind.

**Please leave reviews guys, it helps sooo much! Let me know what you think!**

**On a side note: Thanks Ian ;) and remember Vegas! **


	6. Chapter 6

I pulled out of the driveway with a squeal of my tires and flew off down the road. I rolled down the window and let the crisp fall air wash around me. The smell of the fallen leaves could only relax me for a moment. I had to get there, as fast as I could. There could be no turning back...I had to fix everything, I would do anything for Damon Salvatore...no matter the cost.

THE BOARDING HOUSE

Damon heard her car squeal away. He slid down the wall, sitting there in silence gazing at the canvass sitting in the middle of the room. He closed his eyes and pictured her sitting by the tree. The fireflies dancing around her. He distinctly remembered how the tiny globes of light reflected in her dark eyes that looked on in wonder. The way the wind felt rushing past his face as he chased her playfully through the woods. That night...THAT night, that didn't exist. He threw the brush across the room. He pulled himself up and walked to the painting, running the tips of his fingers across the rough surface. He then pulled the top of it and let it fall to the ground. He then walked away, trying everything humanly possible to brush it off his shoulders, but it wasn't quite as easy in this form he was in. He still felt the sting of tears as he made his way upstairs, he still felt the sinking of his heart and the twist of his stomach. He felt hurt, a genuine inescapable hurt for the first time in 145 years. He went into the a natural instinct of trying to shut it away and turn it off, but the sensation of relief didn't come.

Stefan met him in the hallway upstairs taking in his brothers distraught expression.

"Damon, I'm sorry." He said. And he was. As much as it pained him know how Elena really felt, he still couldn't stand the sight of this look on Damon's face.

"I just...I though it was real. I thought there was truth behind it." Damon said.

Stefan walked up and put his hand on Damon's shoulder. "This is heartache brother." He said.

Damon smiled through his tears looking to the floor for a moment to let the tears hit the floor and then he looked back up. "This is what everyone's been whining about?" He tried to joke. Then he turned away and walked to the room.

ELENA

I pulled into Bonnie's driveway and ran to the door. I pounded on it until she answered.

"Elena?" She asked, startled.

"Bonnie, you have to help me...please?" I begged, nearing hysterics.

"Elena, what is it?" She asked,shaken by my intensity.

"I just had to explain to Damon that I didn't love him and that everything he remembers is all in his imagination!" I nearly yelled. "I'm sure I just broke his heart in two. Do you have any idea how hard it is to do something like that to the face of someone you love!" I cried.

"I thought it was for the best." She said, trying to make understand.

I shook my head violently "No, no...it's not for the best. And apparently Katherine came to see Damon. I know she's behind this Bonnie which means it's not for the best. Not if she is involved. There is no telling what she has planned for Damon." I explained.

She shifted her weight uncomfortably at this news.

"I know you think it's the right thing to do, but is letting Katherine go by her own rules the best for anybody?" I asked.

She stood for a moment thinking deeply. She finally looked back up to me, her jaw set strongly like it always did when she had strong feelings about something.

"Okay." She said.

"Okay?" I gasped.

"Okay, I'll help." She barely got to answer before I wrapped my arms around her neck.

"Oh, Bonnie thank you...thank you!" I cried.

I stepped back and looked at her. "Bonnie, we have to go see Tabitha, the witch that's been helping Katherine. I'm going to make her tell us what we need to know. Or at least tell me where we can find it." I told her.

"Elena, she obviously has a protection spell on her. It takes a lot of power to be able to over come that." She explained doubtfully.

"Yes, I know. She had the protection spell on her for vampires here in Mystic Falls that haven't been quite set to the right diet in a while. I'll take care of that." I explained.

Bonnies eyes widened but then relaxed. "Well, I've been doing a lot of research in grams old books for any information I could find on this spell. I hardly found anything, because it's set back so far in history. But what I did find...you need to know." She said in a serious tone. "Come on in."

BOARDING HOUSE

The Next Day

"Great..just great. Damn it." Damon fussed to himself as he pulled the thermometer out of his mouth reading 102.7. He had a fever for sure. His nose was stuffed, his throat was sore and he was burning up. He pulled another kleenex from the box and walked out into the hall.

"Hey, Stefan!" He called. A moment later Stefan stepped out into the hall. Damon approached him quickly from down the hall. "Hey let me hit that." He said pointing at Stefan.

Stefan raised a brow. "Um...what?"

"I'm sick, you can heal me...just hold up your arm and let's please ignore how creepy this is going to be for me okay?" He snapped.

Stefan squinted at Damon taking in the details of his face. He noticed he was pale, but flushed in his cheeks with fever and he had a light sheen on sweat on his face.

"You have a cold?" Stefan began to laugh.

"How is that funny?" Damon scowled.

"It's just like...classic, you know?...human 101." Stefan laughed again.

Damon began a round of mocking Stefan's laughter with his own sarcastic laugh.

Suddenly there was a knock at the door. They both headed downstairs. Stefan walked to the door and opened it finding Jeremy standing there.

"Jeremy." Stefan said.

"Hey, no offense but move aside." Jeremy said pushing past Stefan. Stefan shut the door once Jeremy walked in and watched him cross the room to where Damon was leaning against the couch looking miserable.

"Hey, dick! We need to talk!" Jeremy thundered.

"Actually, my name is Damon, and what brings you to these parts?" Damon stood slowly walking up to Jeremy.

Jeremy didn't say another word, he just threw a punch hitting Damon on the side of his mouth. Damon stumbled backwards, and his bottom lip began to pour blood.

"That's for ruining my sisters life!" Jeremy yelled.

"The hell!" Damon hissed. "I suggest you don't do that again." Damon warned.

Jeremy's eyes widened in shock.

"Why did that just hurt? How are you bleeding?" He asked in shock. He remembered seeing how vampires had taken punches like a stone statue.

Damon took a second to gain his composure. "Because...I'm human." Damon replied.

"Your full of shit." Jeremy said.

Damon reached out and took Jeremy's hand and laid it on his chest.

Jeremy felt the pounding under his hand and jerked it back.

"I'm human." Damon repeated.

"Oh, well great, in that case..." Jeremy thrust his fist again, against Damon's chest. Damon coughed from the blow and stepped back.

"I said not to do that again." Damon warned once more. But Jeremy didn't listen and punched him in the chest again.

"Fine then." Damon said, punching Jeremy so hard he flew to the ground. Jeremy jumped back up.

"I thought you were human!" Jeremy snapped.

"I am, but that doesn't change the fact that I can kick your ass Gilbert." Damon said wiping his bleeding lip with the back of his hand. "Why are you even here, what's your problem?" Damon asked.

"Your my problem! You changed Elena, she's a vampire!" Jeremy yelled.

"So? I didn't do it. He did." Damon pointed at Stefan.

"No, you did. Elena said so." Jeremy snapped.

"So what's it to you anyways?" Damon asked.

"Damon...I want you to listen to me and listen carefully." Jeremy said walking closer to Damon. Damon smirked. "Your a bad person. You have killed people. People who were loved by other people. The had wives and husbands, sisters and brothers...children. You murdered them in cold blood. For revenge, or spite...or maybe because you were just in a bad mood. You killed Vickie. Matt already has a mother who is never around...and then you killed his sister. He's in high school Damon...and now he lives by himself...eats breakfast alone in the mornings and goes home to no one at night. You have ruined peoples lives, broken their hearts. Unfortunately for them they can't be as heartless as you, so they just have to live in the hell you have created for them. You use people, manipulate people. Now...you even went as far as turning my sister. You want to know why that's so bad? I lost my parents, and Vickie...thanks to you. Eventually Elena is going to have to leave town...because people can't wonder why she looks the same when shes thirty. Thank you Damon...she's really the only thing I had left to call family. To call home. I won't ever be the best man in her wedding because …. well let's face it...what does it matter when your the undead. I won't ever get to hold my niece or nephew...cause she can't ever have children can she?" He asked...tears brimming over his lashes.

Damon's face had already fallen into misery. The more Jeremy spoke...the more Damon's face grew tired, withered and in pain.

"Jeremy...I." Damon looked to the floor not knowing what to say.

"No, don't even bother with an apology. I'm way past it. I don't care. Do us all a favor Damon and get rid of yourself. Especially while your in this condition...you have a chance. I hate you." Jeremy practically spit out. He turned and left, leaving Damon standing there in complete mortification.

Upon hearing the door close Stefan instantly walked to Damon, startled by the shock and sadness on Damon's face. He went to put his hand on Damon's shoulder but Damon jerked it away.

"Don't!...I'm sorry Stefan." Damon said as he fled upstairs.

ELENA

Bonnie opened a large leather bound book and laid it on the table.

"Here." Bonnie ran her finger to a spot on the page. "It says here the spell is called Étoile Traversée." Bonnie explained.

"Is that French?" I asked, surprised.

"Yes. It's where it originated. Apparently it's only been used once. It roughly translates to _Star Crossed. _According to this, almost four hundred years ago a vampire and a witch fell in love. It was somehow conjured or created for their benefit and their benefit only. It's a very difficult spell to cast...it takes a long time to prepare for the strength it requires. Apparently Tabitha is very talented." Bonnie said, looking up at me.

"So, what exactly was it used for?" I asked.

Bonnie looked back down to the page and then back up to me. I realized by the look on her face that she didn't want to answer me.

"Please...just tell me." I asked.

She sighed. "Well, I'm not exactly sure...I mean I can only understand a small bit of this. But it seems that when the witch and the Vampire began their lives together that it wasn't long before they wanted to have a baby to call their own." Bonnie said.

My eyes widened in shock. I wasn't expecting this answer.

"So..." I said.

"Apparently this is a fertility spell Elena. Damon has been turned human in the purpose of being able to father a child." Bonnie answered.

THE BOARDING HOUSE

Damon opened all the drawers in Stefan's study. He opened and slammed them on his mad search. Finally he found a cream colored blank paper and began to leave the room.

"Damon, are you okay?" Stefan asked.

"It's just a cold Stefan...nothing to worry about." Damon said.

Stefan looked over Damon carefully. He had grown very thin. His face was pail but flushed with fever even brighter. His voice sounded thin and scratchy with congestion.

"Damon, your perfectly aware that I'm not talking about your little cold." Stefan fussed.

"Just move.' Damon pushed by Stefan leaving the room. Stefan listened to Damon's footsteps as he made his way down the hall and slammed the door to his room.

Damon scrambled to un ball the paper he had gotten from the study. He laid it out straight and grabbed a pen nearby. In perfect penmanship and loose calligraphy Damon began to write:

**Dearest Elena,**

ELENA

"Oh my-" I gasped standing up from the table.

"Do you think this is what Katherine's up to? Do you think she wants a child with Damon?" Bonnie asked.

I almost felt sick. I put my hand up in protest trying to get Bonnie to not say anything like that again.

"She's not human." I stated.

"No...not yet." Bonnie said.

"What do you mean?" I asked, beginning to grow in panic.

"I told you, this spell calls for a lot of energy from a witch. Tabitha must be biding her time to gather enough energy to change Katherine as well, and in the meantime...make sure they get Damon moved away with Katherine. It's actually a clever plan...if that's what she wants from Damon." Bonnie said.

I realized now just how smart that bitch was. She set it up and it was the perfect storm. She made me forget...driving Damon to forget...sending out a witch with a powerful spell to make him a human. Telling me he would die if I told him of our relationship, causing me to break his heart and to send him...running back to her...just in time for her to be turned...human.

"Does it say how to reverse the spell?" I asked.

"No. It only specifies that they cannot be turned back to a vampire the traditional way...making them drink your blood. But it doesn't say how to actually do it or if you can. It may be designed to keep them human...or to die." Bonnie said.

"It's time to go, Bonnie." I said.

"Where are we going first?" Bonnie asked.

"To get what I need for Tabitha to turn over information." I answered.

We arrived at Matt's house only a little while later.

"What are we doing here?" Bonnie asked.

"Bonnie, please just wait here okay?" I asked.

She nodded, but I could tell by the look on her face that I didn't have long before she would follow me into the house. I got out of the car and flashed to front door. I knocked only once until Matt opened the door.

"Elena? What are you doing here?" Matt asked smiling and surprised.

"Hey, is Caroline around?" I asked.

"Uh..no...she's at the car wash at the school. I was about to head out." He asnwered.

"Mind if I come in, I need to talk to you." I said.

"Yes, come in." Matt said.

I stepped hesitantly through the doorway making sure my foot could make it passed the barrier. I walked into the kitchen.

"So what's going on?" He asked. But before he could finish the sentence I looked him dead in the eye.

"You will not be afraid of anything I do." I said. Compelling him to obey.

"I'm not afraid." He repeated lifelessly.

I lunged toward him but he didn't move an inch, he just stood there as I sank my teeth into his neck, taking in the warm flow of his blood. I had to quickly remind myself, I'd do anything for Damon Salvatore. I'd do anything to get what I want, and nothing would stand in my way.

I felt every fiber of what was me being charged up with energy and strength like I had never felt. I realized quickly that Matt's legs were beginning to grow weak and he was swaying. I had to stop or he would die. I had to stop. I...had ...to..

"Stop!" Bonnie screamed from behind me. I swung my head around to look at her. Her face grew to horror. I'm sure how she saw Matt standing there with blood staining his neck and my face taken over with darkness it scared her.

I looked back at Matt.

"You fell in some water and and hit your neck on something sharp." I said, my eyes piercing his.

"I fell and hurt my neck." He repeated.

"I was never here, nor Bonnie." I said.

"No one was here." He said.

In a flash I grabbed a glass off of the dining room table that was half full of water and through it on the floor. I then pushed a chair to the floor ..the fruit bowl rolled off and crashed. I had to set up a scene that would make sense. I then looked up at him and touched the side of his face.

"I'm sorry." I said, with tears in my eyes. I turned and left grabbing Bonnie's hand to lead her out quickly.

We both made it to the car and got in. I pulled out and headed towards the house Damon and I had just gone only days ago.

"What the hell Elena! What was that!" Bonnie screamed,

I shrugged. "I needed the strength." I answered. "He was the only one close enough to me that he would trust me walking straight in. I didn't need much of an explanation." I explained.

"I can't believe you Elena! I didn't think you would ever do something like that!"She said.

"I needed to do it. He's fine Bonnie." I said.

She gave me a long steady look. "Your becoming like him." She said coldly.

It took everything I had inside of me not to shrug again. I just shook my head.

"I won't do it again." I said.

We made it to the mansion on the hill from the other day. Bonnie and I got out of the car and made our way to the door. After a few knocks Tabitha answered the door.

"Interesting combination this time." Tabitha smiled.

"Can we talk?" I asked.

She opened the door and let us in. "Sorry the place is such a mess." She said laughing. The place wasn't a mess of course. It was spotless in all it's stretched marble floor and lavish decorated glory.

"Katherine here?" I asked.

"Uh, no...she headed to New York to set up a place there." She said.

"For her and Damon?" I asked, knowing that by showing my jealousy that it wasn't sticking to the plan.

She smiled. "What can I help you with Elena?" She asked.

"You can tell me how to counteract the spell you put on Damon." I said flashing my eyes into hers. To my absolute joy she snapped into the zone, indicating that I had trumped her protection and was now compelling her, thanks to my new found strength.

"I don't know how." She answered. "I only studied the first part to it. Not the counteraction." She explained.

I stepped closer to her. "You will give me the book on counteractions." I said.

She walked away and came back quickly handing me a book that was so old you had to hold the binding together.

"This should be all you need." She answered.

"Thank you Tabitha, your much more easier to work with when your being controlled by me." I smiled sarcastically.

Once we were in the car I handed the ancient book to Bonnie. I Dropped her off at her house to study further into the book and she was supposed to meet me at the boarding house when she found some solid answers.

I made my way back and made it inside.

"Stefan, you will never believe what's going on." I said as I walked into the living room. He looked over to me but looked distracted.

"What's wrong?" I asked.

Stefan's brows creased together as if he were concentrating. "I left to hunt a while ago and I just got back. I don't here Damon in the house, do you?" He asked.

I listened carefully and was only met by a completely silent house. I looked at Stefan.

"I'll go check." I said flashing upstairs and to Damon's room. He wasn't there. I turned to head back to the living room when I caught a glimpse of a piece of paper sitting on the edge of his bed.

I picked it up.

**Dearest Elena,**

** I've made some tragic decisions in my life and more so in the post years of my life. I've done bad things to a lot of people. Including you and I'm in love with you. Please try to do the best you can with the eternal life ahead of you and be happy for me. My brother will always take care of you because he's a good soul and he always has been. This is more then the matter of my darker deeds and more to do with the fact that I can't feel the right way about what I've done. I love you Elena, but there's nothing holding me here anymore. I never wanted this life, but here I am. I have the chance to do what is right for the first time and so I will. I'll never forget you wherever and whatever I am after this life. I love you. **

** Damon Salvatore**

A scream escaped me before I could even think. In seconds Stefan arrived in the doorway.

He picked me up where I had collapsed to the floor.

"What's wrong?" He asked in complete horror.

"Damon...he's going to end his own life." I sobbed jamming the letter into his hands. "I have to find him, I can follow his scent." I choked out.

"What are you going to do if you find him, you think you'll be able to stop him?" Stefan looked at me doubtfully.

"I'm going to tell him the truth." I said. "The only thing that matters enough to him..is me." I answered.

**I have a pretty big chapter in mind for the next one. Please leave reviews! I need to know what you think of this chapter to be sure of what I'm doing in the next. Thanks guys. Reviews reviews reviews. :)**


	7. Chapter 7

For once I was thankful for the strong sweet scent Damon had acquired in his human form. I had made it deep into the woods without it once growing weak. I ran faster and faster until the trees were a blur on either side of me. I couldn't let this happen. I couldn't even except the possibility. Flashes of his face flew through my mind and each time it ended in a nightmarish scene of seeing Damon's still, lifeless body before me. He had become a part of me. He was inscribed onto my soul and I would forever be bonded to him irreversibly. His survival meant mine.

I began to pick up the scent of water mixed in with his and it was only a few seconds until I could hear the tranquil sound of it washing onto a bank. I began to notice a clearing in the woods and I recognized the place. It was the same lake Stefan and I had been to. The same lake I sat next to Stefan and assured him he had nothing to worry about with Damon. The irony.

I didn't know what Damon was planning on doing so I ran to the edge of the clearing and looked out to see him from afar. I was afraid if I rushed in on him, it would rush him into whatever was on his agenda. I scanned the lake's edge and the few trees that surrounded it. The moonlight was enough to light up the entire area casting black shadows across the way. Even the water as it rippled picked up tiny angles of light causing a shimmering blanket across the surface. Then, I spotted him. He sat against one of the trees nearest to the bank. He seemed to be looking out onto the water. He seemed calm and peaceful. It wasn't quite the meltdown I was expecting. Then I spotted something white in his hands, he seemed to be turning it over and over as he looked ahead. Finally it was in clear enough view for me to see it was a bottle. Most likely some kind of pill. I was suddenly relieved that I had made it there in time. I began to step forward to make my way to him when someone else appeared in front of him.

DAMON & KATHERINE

Damon looked up as soon as he saw the moonlight broken by someone in front of him.

"Katherine?" He asked.

She smiled. "You know, I can't tell if I love or hate how you can tell Elena and I from each other so easily." She said.

Damon huffed in a laugh. "Easy, I feel a presence of annoyance with one and generally happy with the other. Guess which is which."

Katherine sighed. "What's this?" She asked, taking the bottle from his hands. She read it and her face fell into a look of confusion. "Okay, either your planning on getting some very serious sleep or ….."

"Katherine, just give it back." Damon held out his hand. She stood up straight putting one hand on her hip and holding the bottle with the other.

"Are you serious Damon?" Katherine asked raising her brow.

"Just give it back." He repeated.

"You are serious! Damon Salvatore...you are way too selfish to kill yourself!" She snapped.

Damon put his hand down. A smile stretched slowly across his face. "Yeah, you're probably right about that." He said.

"What's your deal? I came back to get you and your sitting by a lake about to do yourself in? Is the option of coming with me really that horrible?" She asked on the highest level of whining.

Damon stood up and leaned back on the tree crossing his arms in front of him.

"Why would I go anywhere with you?" Damon said. Katherine's face fell for a moment with his comment but quickly regained her confidence raising her chin to answer.

"The way I see it, you can either sit here by the edge of this lake and … put yourself to sleep. Or you can come with me. I know your angry about the last...century or so...but I love you Damon. I know the only reason you were really hanging around here was for Elena. It's obvious she's to hung up on Stefan to care about you." Katherine said.

"Just...leave Elena out of your pitch, okay Katherine? It's really not helping as much as you think." Damon said.

Katherine smiled and took a step towards Damon. "Damon, I know your not happy with me right now, but just come with me. We can start over. I love everything you are and you can just be yourself and not worry so much. Plus...I seem to be the only one with an open door for you...so take care of what you need to here and come stay with me." She pleaded.

Damon stood for a moment looking at her, his expression blank. He looked to the ground and then back up to her. "Ok." He said.

"Really?" She smiled.

"Yeah, okay fine." He said.

She squealed with excitement. "Great! I'm going to head back to New York then. I have a place there. I'll get it completely ready. Just let me know when your ready to go. I'll be waiting." She smiled.

Damon nodded. She stepped closer to him and touched the side of his face. "You won't be disappointed Damon. I promise." She leaned in and kissed him softly on the cheek and disappeared.

ELENA

I felt rage and jealousy like I had never felt before. She was trying the good girl act to get Damon to leave with her. She made me out to not care for him at all knowing that I was in love with him and had threatened me into lying to him about it. Her master plan was quite genius I had to say so myself. She had managed to single handedly talk the love of my life into believing he was cared about by no one but her, and readied him for a life and children with her in New York. Katherine was growing up and ready for a new stage and she wanted Damon along for the ride. We were nothing but board game pieces to her and she had us moved into place just right.

Damon stood for moment after she was completely gone. He walked a few steps closer to the lake. I had, had enough, as soon as I knew Katherine was long gone I realized it was my time to ruin the plans for that bitch. Damon was mine.

I dashed out from behind the tree and ran to where he was standing.

"So that's it? Your just going to pack your bags and move off to New York? Ride off into the sunset with the ice queen?" I asked.

Damon turned quickly, looking at me in shock.

"Elena, what are you doing here?" He asked.

"I came to stop you from killing yourself Damon, and then I walked up to you and Katherine making plans to skip town with each other." I snapped. I knew I had no right to act angry towards him. How was it his fault? He had been almost burned in the sun, his memory erased, told he wasn't loved, lied to and manipulated. How was I able to stand here angry?

"Elena, I'm sorry. I've made a mess here. I've done nothing but destroy peoples lives. I've given you hell. You and Stefan are just fine together and ...I just...don't fit. I am what I am and I've come to realize that recently. I don't need to be around here anymore, especially for your sake. I've done enough damage Elena." He said.

"Oh really? You've made that decision? I need you here Damon please." My voice betrayed me, sounding more panicky then I had planned.

"Why would you need me here Elena? You have your friends, your going to finish high school soon and move on to greater things. You have Stefan and your a sweet girl who deserves nothing but the best. I'm not the best to be around." He said.

"First of all, I'm not as sweet as you think. Second, you seem to have an awful lot to say about yourself Damon. You seem to think your such a nightmare. If that was the case then how did I fall in love with you so easily?" I said before I realized it.

His face snapped into a completely different look. I look of shock, realization and confusion.

"What did you say?" He whispered.

I walked up to him until we were only two inches apart.

"You were right, Damon." I said in almost a whisper. "There is something wrong and I can't explain right now why you can't remember...but I love you. I love you more than I ever thought I could love. We were together, everything you remember is a memory not your imagination. I miss you so much and I want you so bad. You can't leave with her. Your mine." I said as I began to cry.

I felt his hand slide behind my neck. I looked up at his eyes scanning mine intently.

"Don't lie to me." He said softly.

"I swear to you Damon, I'm not lying." I said, tears streaming down my face.

Before I even finished the sentence he kissed me deeply, almost roughly.

Relief, happiness and absolute bliss rushed into me all at one time. He wrapped his arms around my waist kissing me so sweetly. Then it hit, the undeniable thirst for the sweet scent radiating from him. His heart that wrapped against his chest became loud in my ears. I held on for as long as I could until I felt my face begin to grow in darkness. I let my mouth leave his and began to run my lips to his throat. I kissed it lightly and then I pushed him back with a gasp.

He saw my face instantly. "Elena it's okay..." He said taking a step towards me.

"No." Was all I could say. I took another step back. I loved him but right now it was his blood that I wanted. It was all that mattered. I listened sharply to his heart thumping under his chest. The venom in my mouth began to swell.

He walked towards me. "Damon stop." I ordered.

"No, it's okay Elena." He said again. He came up and grabbed my shoulders. "Go ahead, do it." He said.

"Damon?" I gasped, looking at his eyes. He was calm...almost peaceful. "Get away from me." I said against my own wishes.

"No." He said. "No, Elena. I've spent too much time away from you." He said pulling me closer . "You can do this." He whispered, holding me to him.

I shut my eyes tight trying to control the thirst I had. I began to count the beats to distract myself. My face finally loosened a little. He pulled me back and met my lips again.

"I'm so sorry I lied to you." I whispered in between kisses.

"Shhh." He whispered. Before I knew it we were pulling at each others cloths. His shirt, my shirt, one by one the clothing fell to the ground.

He laid me down close to the bank of the lake where the forest floor was lush with ferns. His body laid softly on top of mine. It was heaven in that moment after so long living in hell. He kept his eyes on mine, his face stricken with the release of everything we had been through together but yet so far apart. His midnight hair hung around his face, trembling with every move and stuck to his face with sweat. I couldn't control it as my face grew dark again. He saw it and before I noticed he struck his hand on a low tree stump next to us bringing blood to the surface, and without a word he brought it to my lips. I had never tasted anything in my life that brought that much power to me instantly, like every part of me was on fire.

I listened to the night around me, his rapid breathing, his pounding heart. "I love you, Elena" He whispered.

A few hours later we made it back to the boarding house. As we made our way inside we found Bonnie sitting on the couch with Stefan.

"Welcome back." Stefan said smiling at Damon. "Maybe uh, you could get rid of that cold now." Stefan said holding up his arm.

Damon laughed lightly. "Actually, I'm cured." Damon said, his eyes flickering in my direction.

"Well good." Stefan said nodding, beginning to understand.

I would have found this all amusing but I was more concentrated on Bonnie, who, through this whole ordeal never faltered from her serious expression looking off from us all.

"Bonnie?" I called. She looked up and smiled although it never reached her eyes.

"Hey Bonnie, your over kind of late. Did I miss our date?" Damon winked jokingly.

"Not tonight Damon, you didn't miss it tonight." She joked sweetly back with him. But even then I knew Bonnie enough to know she was in no joking mood and was only trying to be nice. More nice to Damon than usual actually.

"Hey, Elena. Mind if we talk? Alone?" She added. I nodded, beginning to feel a growing sense of panic even when I though it wasn't possible. I had been so happy a second ago. On top of the world.

We made our way to the large patio on the back of the house. I followed Bonnie as she continued a few yards further.

"Bonnie, what's going on?" I asked. As soon as I said it she turned quickly. I noticed her face was drawn in hurt and tears were already forming in her eyes.

"Elena, It's bad." She said.

"What's bad Bonnie?" I said growing horribly afraid.

"To get Damon back the way he should be." She cried.

"What is it Bonnie, what has to be done?" I asked.

She placed her hand on my shoulder.

"Elena, to be a vampire again...he has to die." She said.

I flinched thinking about the idea of it. I didn't know how I was going to handle having to watch the horror of it.

"Bonnie, that's horrible, but...it's not that different from anyone becoming a vampire. He just doesn't have to drink a vampires blood." I explained.

She continued to look at me in immense sadness as if she hadn't heard a word I said.

"Bonnie...what's going on?" I asked.

She shook her head and then looked to the ground.

"Bonnie!" I said sternly.

She looked back up. "Returning to a vampire form with this spell...when they die...a lot of them don't ever transfer. They just...die." Bonnie cried.

**Guys, thanks so much for your reviews last time. DamonLuver1 lol! Pretty intense chapter coming up next but I need your reviews, please! :) 3 Alexis**


	8. Chapter 8

It took several moments for Bonnie's words to truly sink in. Thought's came rushing through my mind. How every single part of me was bent on having everything back to the way I wanted it. I thought all the answers were so easy. I would stop at nothing to get what I wanted but now I was halted suddenly in my own tracks, because if there was anything that could stop me, it was the possibility of losing Damon forever.

"Bonnie, I can't do it then. I thought this was only used once before?" I questioned.

" It was created for only one situation but when I read Tabitha's book for the reversal it talked about different occasions. From reading it I can tell it doesn't happen very often but it is a possibility." She explained, her face apologetic.

"I don't know what to do now." I said.

"My suggestion Elena...is tell Damon the truth about it all and let him decide." Bonnie said.

I stood for a moment thinking. I knew she was right but I was afraid of the decision he would make either way. I finally looked at Bonnie and nodded.

"Okay, but first things first." She smiled lightly.

We made our way inside and found Damon in mid conversation with Stefan. Bonnie walked up to Damon and placed her hand on his shoulder.

"Damon I need you to hold still and close your eyes." Bonnie said.

"Bonnie, look..I know you find me irresistible but please...not in front of Elena." He grinned.

Bonnie tried to look annoyed, but her smile betrayed her.

"Just do what I say." She ordered.

He backed away from her a little and closed his eyes. She spoke quietly to herself for a moment and then Damon's eyes finally opened back up. But instead of looking happy from all the memories that had just flooded back into his mind, he looked angry..his eyes were sharp and severe.

"Damon?" Was all I could say.

He looked over at me, and as quickly as he could he crossed the living room and wrapped his arms tightly around me.

"I'm so sorry." He whispered. "I'm so sorry Elena."

"For what?" I asked, confused by the shift in his mood.

"For everything you have been put through. For everything _Katherine _has put you through." He said through his teeth. I looked up at him, he was past angry...he was seething with it. He put his hand to his chest almost as if it was the first real time he took notice of it. "Why did she do this?" He asked almost as if to himself.

"It's a spell that was used a long time ago so that a vampire could be able to...have children." I answered. His eyes grew in shock.

"She … twisted everything around. She did all this...because..." He was speaking in broken sentences as his anger grew to fury. "I was so...happy before."

"Damon, we remember now. It's going to be fine." I said trying to comfort him.

"No! I can't let her get away with this. She will not get away with this!" He said. I heard his heart stammer and pound against his chest.

I noticed Bonnie give me a quick worried glance behind him.

"Bonnie." He said suddenly turning towards her. She almost seemed to jump. "How do I change back? How do we reverse this." He said, jabbing his finger to his chest.

Her mouth opened but she seemed to have the words stuck in her throat. Her eyes flickered to me questioningly. Damon caught the look and looked back at me as well.

"No, don't do this. Just tell me." He said.

"You have to die, Damon." Bonnie finally answered.

"Fine...let's do it." He said beginning to walk as if he had a direct path to death already mapped out.

"No!" I cried out.

He turned and looked at me like he couldn't possibly figure out why I was would be bothered by this.

"Damon, the spell reversal for this is...dangerous." I explained.

His brow raised in question. "More dangerous then dying?" He said, a small smile playing at the corners of his mouth.

"Damon, I'm serious. Bonnie read that sometimes the spell doesn't work all the way and when you die...it's permanent."

He looked at me for a long moment with a blank expression. I was sure he was trying to weight the odds as quickly as he could but his expression melted when I gave him an exasperated look, pleading him to take it seriously.

I saw Bonnie give Stefan a look and they both quietly left the room to give Damon and I a chance to speak in private.

"Damon, I know your angry and you want to be back to normal. Trust me I want the same thing but I can't just ignore that something horrible might happen to you." I explained. He sighed and nodded looking to the floor. He came over and took my hand, leading me to the couch. He sat down and pulled me into his lap. I laid my head down on his chest and reached up playing with the hair that flipped up on the nape of his neck.

"How sure is it?" Damon asked.

"She said it doesn't happen often but it has happened." I answered.

After several minutes of silence I felt Damon's hands on my shoulders as he leaned me back to face me.

"Look. I love you, so much." He began, tucking my hair behind my ear. "I'm tired of being pushed around. I managed to keep those kinds of things at bay for a long, long, very long time and I'm not okay with it going on now. In this form, I can't take care of the things I want to...and quite honestly...when I finally got you, after all this time I was truly happy...for the first time. I was ready to live my life with you for the rest of eternity until Katherine and her evil posse decided to begin a war with me. I know this is a big chance to take, but I feel like we would be cheating ourselves out of true happiness in the name of fear. I try to live my everyday without regret...and yes...that's caused a lot of trouble for me but...the last thing I want to do is make a weak decision involving you. I want you Elena...forever. You and I ….it's a kind of a big deal." He smiled. I felt butterflies. "But...I won't do it if you truly don't want me to. I'd give anything, sacrifice anything for you."

I studied his face closely. His sharp blue eyes were sincere as they pierced mine. His dark hair hung carelessly around his face. His cheeks were flush, his lips were brighter then I had ever seen before. It astounded me how beautiful he was, no matter if his heart was beating or not. I ran my fingers through his hair and watched him close his eyes briefly at my touch. I loved him, desperately no matter what he was. I thought about the last year of my life in quick flashes until I was sitting here with Damon and I realized that I was right where I wanted to be and I wanted it to last for as long as I could ever make it.

"How are you so confident that it's all going to be okay?" I asked.

His brows pulled together in a troublesome way as he thought. "I know you won't like to hear this but...the way I see it is Katherine put me this way because obviously she wanted to not only get me back but she wanted to attach herself to me through...a child." He explained as I flinched at the thought. "I know she wouldn't stand for me staying human so obviously she would have been turning me back if her plan had gone through. I honestly don't believe she would take a big risk in me dying. For her selfish needs...not for my sake. But still..." He said. I nodded. His logic seemed to make since to me.

"Okay." I said. "I'm okay with it...for the most part anyway. If you believe it will be okay...then I'll believe it." I said.

He smiled. "I love you."

"I love you to." I whispered.

"Okay...so...how should we do this? A gun...a knife..Stefan beheading me as he's wanted to do for so long?" He smiled.

"Not funny." I said.

He laughed lightly. "I'm sorry. But seriously. I have some very strong sleeping pills." He suggested.

"Takes too long." I answered.

"I can jump off of something." He said.

"Too...messy. Damon! I can't discuss this anymore. It's too horrible." I said feeling tears in my eyes.

"I can help." Stefan said appearing in the living room. "Element of surprise. It will be easier if you don't know exactly what's coming. Plus...I'm stronger then you. You won't be able to fight back." Stefan explained.

"Is this a matter of you helping or...taking out your anger." Damon asked.

"Both?" He said smiling.

I rolled my eyes. "Well, you two seem to be jumping at the chance to get this done but...I think I'm going to need a moment to pump myself up if you don't mind." I said.

"Take all the time you need." Damon said as I got up and made my way outside with Bonnie.

Bonnie and I sat down on the back patio for a short while in silence. I looked at her face and noticed she looked a little bothered.

"Bonnie...you okay?" I asked.

She smiled apologetically. "I'm a little worried." She said.

"Yeah...me to." I replied.

"Yeah..it's actually something else. I mean don't get me wrong...I'm actually really scared about Damon. But..."

"But, what?" I asked.

"I'm really worried about...what's going to happen if this works out perfectly fine." She said.

"Why is that?" I asked.

"Elena, do you have any idea how angry Damon really is right now? What kind of hell will be released on Katherine and everyone?" She asked.

"Since when do you care about Katherine's well being?" I asked, surprised by her concern.

"Oh trust me Elena...It's not Katherine I care about...it's the surrounding areas and the people in it. You know Damon, we all do. It's not a pretty thing when he's mad." She said. Then she looked up at me and her face creased with real concern.

I realized suddenly that I was smiling. Like really smiling. I suddenly relaxed my face.

"Elena...I'm actually a little worried about you to..." Bonnie said, her eyes scrutinizing my fading smile.

"Bonnie...please. Don't be worried. Everything is going to be just fine." I assured her.

She nodded, trying to smile. But her face was still uneasy.

"Alright...Let's get this over with." I finally said.

We made our way inside but as I was walking through the the living room I heard Stefan and Damon talking out in the front yard. Bonnie and I made our way out there.

"Hey." Damon turned smiling sweetly as I made my way to him.

"Is this where your doing it?" I asked feeling my stomach knot up.

Damon nodded, his face soft and concerned for me. I smiled back reassuringly.

"Okay, you ready?" Stefan asked.

"Elena, you don't have to be out here for this." Damon said looking worried.

"I'm not leaving." I said. Bonnie began to make her way back to the porch.

"Okay." Damon said running his hand softly across the back of my hair.

He began to back away from me and Stefan took a few steps back getting in motion for his next move. Then it got silent and I heard Damon's heart accelerate.

"Wait." Damon said. He walked back to me. "Elena...if anything happens. Just in case...I love you. I'll always love you no matter what." He said. Tears instantly formed in my eyes.

"I love you." I choked out.

"You know...we don't have to do this if you don't want to." He stepped even closer to me and touched my face. His eyes sparkled the brightest blue in the moonlight. "We could always...just turn you back. We could..." He stopped and laughed quietly looking to the ground. He looked back up and I noticed his face was blushed and his heart skipped a few beats. "We could always..get married...maybe have a baby of our own some day." He said.

It suddenly felt like the earth moved under my feet. The world came shattering down at his words. It was a new level of love that I felt emanating from his body to mine. Tears streamed from my eyes. "Good thing we have forever. I'd really like that someday." Knowing that I did want it...but for now our journey was only beginning. I also realized suddenly what Bonnie was really afraid of. Because in that moment I knew...that I had never tamed the beast that was Damon, he had only awoken the one in me. And I wanted it that way, with him.

"So it's a deal? You want that later on?" He asked.

"I do." I said nodding.

He backed up never moving his eyes from mine. "Okay." He whispered. "I'm ready."

Stefan appeared like lightning from nowhere and had Damon in his grasp. It was such a blur all I saw was Damon grasping at Stefan's hands on his neck. I looked away trying to hold my emotions back as I heard him struggle under Stefan's hands. I heard him struggling to breath, his heart stammered and went into hyper drive. His pulse filled the air with the desperate need to survive and then suddenly it began to slow...skip and then...silence.

**I'll be working on the next chapter soon. Please let me know what you think! :D**


	9. Chapter 9

As soon as Damon hit the ground I launched toward him falling to the ground where he was. I put my head on his chest and sure enough it was silent.

"Damon! Wake up!" I screamed. I felt Stefan's hands grab my shoulders trying to pull me away from him.

"Come on Elena." He said softly.

"No! Let go of me!" I screamed and fell back to Damon's chest. He let me be for a few moments. As I laid there listening for any sudden signs of life I caught a glimpse of Bonnie standing on the porch, her hands pressed to her mouth and tears streaming down her face.

I felt Stefan's hands on my shoulders again. "Elena, please...I'll take him inside but you have to get up." He said.

I nodded and slowly moved out of the way. Stefan picked up Damon and carried his lifeless body inside where he laid him on the couch.

I looked over Damon's face. It was pale, and slack. It was the most nightmarish thing I had ever seen. Damon looked dead...like seriously dead. I began to pace, ignoring Bonnie's attempts at comforting looks, ignoring Stefan chattering about giving it time. I just paced. I paced until I was sure that I had worn a path in the deep grained wood at my feet.

A few times I stopped to cry, kneeling on the side of the couch, brushing Damon's hair from his face. Then I would return to my pacing. The worst thing I couldn't get over was not knowing whether I had the right to hope any longer...or If it was time to start mourning his death. I just didn't know. But as time wore on, I began to lose hope. Bonnie cried quietly in the corner of the room, Stefan hung his head trying to let the truth sink in. A truth that was beginning to crash in on me like a train barreling down the tracks. Damon was gone. He was gone forever.

I realized suddenly how silent the entire house was. How silent the world seemed. When Stefan put his hand on my shoulder and turned me around. I watched in horror as tears streamed loosely from his eyes. "I'm sorry, Elena." He whispered. That's when a blood curdling scream escaped from my throat before I even knew I had done it. I jerked out from Stefan's grasp and ran to Damon's side.

"Damon. DAMON!" I screamed. I pressed on his chest trying to wake him. I watched as his body sank and rose in response to my pushing and his hair fell into his eyes. But nothing...nothing happened other then my own forced animation. "Please Damon...please don't leave me..please." I sobbed, I sobbed so hard it could have sounded like a hysterical laugh. Stefan jerked me off of the floor and wrapped his arms around me, and I finally allowed him to do it. I pressed my face into his chest and let the tears fall. I felt the jerks in his chest as he cried along with me. Bonnie inched her way to us with tears in her eyes and well. She lightly put her arms around both of us.

I felt Stefan's cheek rise from the top of my head and suddenly his chest became still. It seemed strange and I looked up at his face. I followed his intense focus to behind me. Where Damon was slowly sitting up. He brushed his hair from his eyes sleepily. In a deeper huskier voice then usual I heard him call my name.

In a flash I was kneeling in front of him. I looked up into his face just as he opened his eyes. His intimidating crystal blue eyes. It took me moment to actually let it sink in that he was okay. I took in every detail of him. I moved from his eyes to his dark hair that seemed thicker as it tumbled around his face. His shoulders, his arms were broader again, changed back into the predatory body he had always had. His skin was smooth and pale like cream marble.

"Damon?" I finally was able to say.

He smiled, his face suddenly seeming to wake completely...his eyes becoming brighter. "My angel." He said. He ran his fingers softly across my lips leaving a tingle in them. He stood and so did I and he wrapped his arms around me tightly. We stood like that for what seemed like a very long time. I squeezed my eyes shut saying a silent thank you over and over as my chest began to rise with pure concentrated joy. I would be with him forever.

Suddenly his arms disappeared and when I opened my eyes he was completely gone. I looked around to see where he had suddenly flashed to. Stefan and Bonnie both were doing the same. Then all of the sudden Stefan was picked up and flew backwards hitting the living room wall and falling to the floor. His eyes darted around wildly when Damon appeared in front of him. Damon was chuckling darkly. "That's for killing me little brother. You got off easy." He smiled.

Stefan laughed nervously in return. "Welcome back, Damon." He said standing to his feet.

I took a step towards Damon. "How are you feeling Damon, are you okay?" I asked.

He turned and looked at me, his eyes were wild and overly alert.

"I'm hungry." He said. His eyes flickered towards Bonnie and back to me as his brows pulled together with trouble. I realized in that moment that him saying he was hungry was an understatement because I realized just then that he had considered Bonnie to take care of that for a flash moment. But he knew better and he was fighting it. The darkness began to form around his eyes.

I flashed to his side and grabbed his wrist. "Let's go, we'll find something." I said.

We made our way through the woods. We were taking a short cut to the hospital across town, I would tap into the blood bank. It was the quickest way I knew to get him what he needed. Damon jumped up and grabbed a branch far over our heads. He swung back and forth a couple of times and dropped back to the ground with perfect cat like precision.

"Feels good." He grinned, cutting his eyes at me.

I smiled in return.

We finally made it out of the woods and found ourselves in the back parking lot of the hospital.

"Okay, so we take out the nurses station and then-"

"No, Damon. We're going to the blood bank to spare lives, not take out nine people in the process." I shook my head.

"Hmm, okay." He said smiling but somehow seemed a little bored with the simplicity. "Fine I'll stall them and you get the bags." He said. I nodded.

We made our way inside. The hospital was quiet in these late hours. There was two nurses at the desk.

"Hi ladies." Damon said approaching the desk. They both looked up and instantly began drinking in his eyes. I smiled lightly as I walked on by. He was certainly hard to look away from..

I made my way down the hall and walked into the back room where the bags were in a huge refrigerated area. I grabbed several and made my way to the back emergency exit. I reached up and yanked out the wire that connected to the sensor to keep the alarm from sounding. I was half way across the parking lot when Damon made his way to my side.

"That was easy." He said. Once in the woods he looked over to my arms where I carried the bags. I knew he was having trouble not yanking them out of my hands. I stalled to hand over one. His face clouded with darkness and a quarter way through the bag a rustle in the woods caught our attention. Damon's predatory features were strong with hunger and he peered sharply into the woods ahead of us. I heard a girl gasp and I could quickly feel the thump of her speeding heart and could smell the fear coming from her. Then another heartbeat became clear. My eyes focused ahead and I saw that it was a female, with shoulder length blond hair. Her eyes wide with horror. Then the guy that was with her walked up behind her matching in a face of horror. They were both wearing scrubs and I realized they obviously worked together in the hospital and were out in the woods fooling around. I heard a dangerous hiss escape Damon's lips and before I could stop him he dropped the bag at his feet and dashed over to the girl sinking his teeth into her neck. The guy grabbed Damon's shoulder trying to pull him off yelling at him. Damon swung his arm out to the side and knocking the guy easily off his feet sending him several feet back. I ran to Damon.

"Stop it! You have to stop." I pleaded. He looked at me suddenly still holding the back of her neck.

"Relax, I won't kill her I swear. I'll just make them forget. Come on, have some...just a little." Damon smiled.

"Damon, no. We need to get out of here." I said.

He reached out and brushed his hand lightly through my hair. "Come on sweetheart. It will be fine." He said softly. I looked at the girls neck, a small scarlet ribbon of blood ran down her neck. I could feel my face turning to darkness. But instead I flashed over to the guy sitting on the ground in horror and jerked him up.

"Sorry." I whispered into his shocked face. I sank my teeth into his neck and drew the warmth from him. Until the guy began to loose the strength in his knees Damon stood a mere two feet behind me, but as he began to fall Damon put his hand on my shoulder.

"Okay, stop Elena." He said. I released him but as he fell Damon grabbed his arm helping him steady. "Okay, whoa...careful." He said. The guy seemed to be in a trance along with the girl who was now standing nearby. "Okay buddy. You and your girl were out in the woods when an animal came out of nowhere and got you both." Damon said smoothly.

"It got us both." The guy repeated.

"That a boy." Damon patted his head. He turned to the girl and repeated the same thing. "And now you guys need to get out of the woods and back to the hospital." Damon explained.

"We need to get back." The girl said nodding.

"Mhmm." Damon nodded smiling.

Then we gathered the bags and we were running. I smiled feeling a sense of giddiness. I had my Damon back. I reached out and took his hand in mine as we made our way through the woods.

**Sorry for such a long wait guys, I drove over to L.A for some fun but I'm back :)**

**Reviews! **


	10. Chapter 10

**An Ode to Damon & Elena**

** She's My Ride Home**

** Song by Blue October**

_We talked  
Together sharpening the knife  
Like killing partners for a life  
Hey, we can hide the bodies on the ride home_

Now here we are  
We're licking skin to wipe us clean  
Strike a match, pour gasoline  
Ditch the scene and watch this city burn  
Asleep, my life will be a pillow steering wheel turn

I'll be reaching for the stars with you, honey  
Who cares cause no one else believes  
so I set fire to everyone around, but you  
-I told you  
I told you we'd do it 

The town was alive with the hustle of graduation day. Graduation robes splashed color throughout the whole campus. I stood with Jenna, Jeremy and a few relatives from further north out in front of the school taking pictures.

"Your parents would be so proud of you Elena." Jenna chirped with tears in her eyes. I smiled as we hugged. "I know I am so very proud of you." She said.

"Thank you Jenna." I said sincerely.

We mingled for a bit until I spotted the dark haired beauty across the campus leaning against the wall with undoubtedly the sexiest grin I had ever seen and it was reserved just for me. I said my thank you's to the family and made my way to him.

"Congrats graduate. What are you wearing up under this robe?" He said sliding his arms around my waist and meeting me with a sincere kiss.

"Excuse me." Two freshman girls giggled and pushed their way through us. They both looked back up to Damon and back at each other engaging in a secretive giggle again.

Damon stood and smiled at me and then nodded towards them. I nodded and we made our way in after them. Right inside the gym it was empty and dark in a room off to the side. That's were we led them. Damon crooned them into standing still with almost no effort from his liquid voice. There eyes went into a trance. Together we fed.

**4 days later...**

I stood out on the balcony facing the ocean. The waves crashed sending flares of sunlight sparkling. I watched my former class mates party on the beach. It was our senior trip and the beach seemed like the perfect place.

"You put the ocean to shame with beauty." Damon purred in my ear. He wrapped his arms around me. I smiled and laid my head back on his chest. I was in absolute paradise with him here. We found it difficult to actually leave the hotel room and judging by the way he slid his hands across my stomach I doubt we would be leaving anytime soon.

"I wish this could be forever." I said.

"We can have anything we want, Elena. Anything...for as long as you want it." He assured me.

"So we're sticking to our plan?" I asked.

"Yes." He said. The plan I was referring to was the plan we were to set in motion in only a few days from now. We we're going to spend a few lazy perfect days in this beautiful place and then we were heading north. To Kill Katherine. I was looking forward to it.

Later on I decided to join everyone on the beach.

"Go on without me, I'll meet you down there in just a few." Damon said. "I'm booking flights for when we leave. New York bound." He smiled flashing his eyes brilliantly. I kissed his shoulder and grabbed a towel and left.

**BONNIE**

Bonnie saw Elena making her way across the lobby to go to the beach. She was about to call to her but then she realized Damon wasn't with her. She decided this would be the perfect time to have the discussion with Damon that she's been needing to have. She waited until Elena was out of sight and then quickly dashed to the elevator. She made it to the third floor and found room 305. She knocked. Damon opened the door.

"Well, what a pleasant surprise." Damon smiled snapping his phone shut.

"Hey Damon." She smiled back.

"You know it's not nice to hang around in hotel rooms with your best friends boyfriend." Damon winked.

"Shut up, I need to talk to you while Elena and you aren't fused together." She laughed lightly.

"Fair enough,you may enter" He said holding the door open as she walked in.

She walked in and sat down in a chair by the balcony doors.

"You guys got the better room." She said looking around.

"I might have paid a little extra." Damon shrugged, sitting on the bed. "What's going on?" He asked wanting to get to the point of her visit.

"To be honest Damon...I'm worried about Elena." She said growing very serious.

Damon's brows pulled together in question. "And why is that?" He asked.

"I know you and Elena have been feeding on people at home and I'm sure since you have been here." She said gesturing around her.

"Mmkay, and the part that is concerning?" Damon asked growing slightly annoyed.

"Just that Damon! This is Elena we're talking about. She would never in her right mind do those kinds of things. Honestly I'm afraid of who she's becoming." She sat forward trying to plead with her eyes to make him understand how much this bothered her.

"We do what we want Bonnie." He said.

"No, YOU do what you want Damon...not Elena. I thought you were different now anyways. I thought being a human had...changed you." She said.

"Bonnie let me explain something to you. First of all...yes...I am different. I'm finally warming up to the feeling something for the first time in centuries." He said patting his chest. "And what I feel is love. I'm painfully in love with Elena and you know it. Yes, were doing a few things against the rules but no body is dying and it won't be too long from now that we'll have to leave Mystic Falls. Elena isn't getting any older, neither am I." He got off the bed and kneeled down in front of Bonnie. "Bonnie please hear me. I know your afraid that she's just another Katherine but your wrong. Katherine is a cold monster who wouldn't know love if it staked her in the heart. Elena is nothing but love. Yes...her character is a little bent but she's a vampire now and those kind of things happen. I promise you Bonnie. She's still a good girl and I will spend the rest of eternity making sure she stays that way." He said in the most sincere tone Bonnie had ever seen.

"Thank you." Bonnie smiled tears brimming the bottom of her lashes. "So...the rest of eternity huh?"

"Maybe...maybe not." Damon said.

"What does that mean?" Bonnie asked.

"It means...we'll see how it goes. I want whatever Elena wants. We want to see the world. Live a little. But when she starts missing you, Caroline, Jenna and Jeremy and even Mystic Falls maybe we will come back. When you guys start getting married and having babies..she might want that. And I'll do that too Bonnie. I'll take humanity any day and spend the rest of my life with her and our children, growing old together." Damon said.

Bonnie jumped of the chair and wrapped her arms around Damon's neck. "Oh thank you, Damon!" She cried. "Thank you, thank you, thank you!"

He laughed lightly. They stood up.

"I might even get a jump start on one of them." Damon grinned.

"Huh?" Bonnie tilted her head.

Damon reached into his pocket and showed Bonnie what he had.

"Oh my god." She said bringing her hands to her mouth.

**Elena**

I waited on the beach, watching the sun hit the horizon filling the sky with an amazing pink and orange hue. The ground rumbled with the waves crashing and turning. I looked over at everyone playing in the water and sitting on the beach. Everyone was happy, and ready to begin their lives. Some in Mystic Falls, others, who knew. I knew I was happy, truly. For whatever may come. I looked down at the white sundress I had on and watched it flutter and dance at my ankles in the wind.

"I love you." I heard Damon say. I turned to meet his gaze, noticing how the sunset reflected perfectly in the deep blue of his eyes.

"I love you." I said. I reached out and rested my hand on his chest. Noticing his loose black collard button down was open a little on the top, and his jeans hung perfect all the way down to his bare feet.

He had a strange look on his face. Something like nervousness but more.

"Are you okay?" I asked. Suddenly he hugged me tight to him with a sense of urgency.

"I love you so much, Elena." He said again.

"Damon." I said pulling back. "I love you to, but what's going on?" I asked.

"Everything's perfect." He smiled. "Look at that sunset." He said nodding towards the ocean. I turned and looked out over the vast waters. The blue in the water reminded me of his eyes. It reminded me of him. Beautiful, eternal. I turned back around and found him down on one knee. I gasped and took a step back.

"Elena. I've been waiting a very, very long time for you. I've been through hell and back and I'd do it again a million times if it always came down to you. You've saved my life. You've hated me, you've loved me. But unless I can have you for the rest of my existence ...I'd rather never see another day. Marry me. Elena."

"Yes. Yes..."


End file.
